It’s official. I’m a crazy cat lady.
Alright. Alright. I’ve always been a crazy cat lady. But I didn’t really have a choice, since loving cats is all part of my namesake. No really. Kotecki means cat lover. Or so I’m told.
But it’s officially official because I have one of my own. One who both terrorizes and amuses me. One who drives me insane in one instant and melts my heart in the next. One who goes by Sasquatch.
So in an effort to introduce this charismatic cat to the world and appease my crazy cat ladydom, (or maybe the claws of insanity are slowly tightening their grip on my mind), I decided to write a poem.
…About my cat
With burnt and curly whiskers from an inspection too close to the flame,
All puffy and soft and mischievous, Sasquatch is his name.
He creeps around every corner surveying your tasty feet with delight,
And eyes your innocent arms with claws prepared to fight.
About as weird as they come, he does cat things backwards-
Diligently attempting to bury his food, but refusing the same for turds.
He dips his paws in water bowls, each time with a reaction of surprise,
And surveys his domain atop a snowboard throne over three times his size.
Curious and stubborn (and creepy) he watches while you shower,
And sits entangled in the laundry rack as one of many assertions of power.
Oh but then he is vulnerable, and cuddly, and heart warmingly kind,
With purring and sleepy eyes that wipe all the trauma out of your mind.
But even as I write this, his claws are planning yet another attack on my feet,
So I think it’s time I stop, and attempt to bargain with a treat.
So there you have it. Perhaps there will be more. A Sasquatch comic in the near future? Maybe I’m crazy. And maybe no one should ever be this obsessed with their cat. Or maybe, just maybe, Sasquatch is just that weirdsome. Yes. Awesomely weird.
I might be losing it….